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The Spiritual Discipline Of Solitude - 11/13/2014

11/21/2014

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I was wonderful to hear the reflections at our last group meeting regarding how members of the group could sense a spirit of the group as welcoming, open and supportive where those participating felt invited to share without any pressure to do so. I was touched by folks describing this experience as having shifted the spiritual context in their lives. Truly a testament to this group's members and it's spirit.

As we discussed the Introduction to the evening's texts, we focused on the term "tribes". For us, the tribes we associate with are our families, our communities, our nation, our society. These shape us deeply into who we are; "we learn to love whatever our tribe loves."  As we enter into solitude we make ourselves strangers to our "tribes" which allows us to discover our own voice; the true self outside of the forces that have shaped us. This very much seemed to capture the flavor of Matthew 10:29-30: “Amen, I say to you, there is no one who has given up house or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or lands for my sake and for the sake of the gospel  30 who will not receive a hundred times more now in this present age"  It takes courage to let go of the certainty of our tribal knowledge and immerse our the unknown quest for our own voice and trust it even if it differs from that of our tribe.

In looking closely at Merton we discussed how Solitude is an act, a conscious choice that has substance to those who undertake it with purpose. The work of Solitude is the active work of  "destroying all fences and throwing away all the disguises, getting down to the naked core of one's inmost desire, which is the desire of liberty-reality". In other words, Solitude opens us up to our desire to be our true selves, and to do this requires that we explore, question and strip away all those identities we inherited or were imposed upon us by our tribes that we find do not resonate with who we are. Once we find out true self in solitude, through discipline we engage in an active life which "keeps body and soul together, harmonizes their powers, brings them into deep resonance, orients the whole being toward the root of being."  Without such a discipline, "the active life can be that which is most passive: one is simply driven, carried, batted around, moved. The most desperate illusion and the most common one is to fling oneself into the mass that is in movement and be carried along with it: to be part of the stream of traffic going nowhere but with a great sense of phony purpose."

As we looked at Another Voice, an excerpt from When Things Fall Apart by Pema Chodron, we were struck by what it means to be fully alive to the messiness (and excitement) of life's experience: "Seeking security or perfection, rejoicing in feeling confirmed and whole, self-contained and comfortable, is some kind of death... We are killing the moment by controlling our experience. Doing this is setting ourselves up for failure, because sooner or later, we're going to have an experience we can't control...The essence of life is that it's challenging.... From an awakened perspective, trying to tie up all the loose ends and finally get it together is death, because it involves rejecting a lot of your basic experience. To be fully alive, fully human and completely awake is to be continually thrown out of the nest. To live fully is to be always in no-man's land, to experience each moment as completely new and fresh. To live is to be willing to die over and over again. From the awakened point of view, that's life." Living this way takes courage, but provides us true freedom in our willingness to accept what comes and trust that it is for our own benefit.  Rumi's Poem - The Guest House speaks to living this attitude:
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A book recommended by one of our group members for dealing with the difficult realities of life was: The Other Side of Chaos by Margret Silf.  I would also recommend Pema Chodron's books, they provide wonderful insights on how to develop the courage to live life and fully experience it.
1 Comment
ninjaessays reviews link
1/28/2019 05:49:54 am

Life is complex and too complicated, and that's a reality. There is nothing we can change about it but to know how to deal with the right way. At our age, maturity should strike us really hard and should train us to del with the flow with the life. Sometimes, it's stagnant ands not moving, but the calmness of it doesn't mean it will be calm forever. There are times wherein you need to prepare for the worst, and you must know how to deal with it. I am telling you, life is not the kindness thing, but it can be our friend only if you know how to play with it.

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    Paul Uccello and I have been facilitating the Bridges to Contemplative Living with Thomas Merton program at the  Spiritual Life Center in West Hartford CT since the Spring of 2013. I've begun posting reflections from these workshops here starting in Fall 2014.

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